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NES Retreat Special Report: Gamecube a sham! Real next-gen system revealed

The Guide to NES l33tn355

Zeroes of the NES - Where Are They Now?

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Those jackoffs that say videogames can never be considered art have OBVIOUSLY never played Bad Dudes. You'd think the massive plot would've been written by Tolstoi. Am I the only one that picked up on the subtle metaphors of classic literature?
Here's something I wrote a year ago as I was extremely BORED:

Oh NES, oh NES
Oh how I love you
Theres lots of new systems
But none are above you

These newer systems have power
And BOY, do they flaunt it
But I say "If its over 8 bits
I dont want it"

You brought joy to me
Like no other toy could
Without the NES How could I have gotten
through childhood?

You were hard to get working
My screen would be gray
But thats not much of a price
For superb gameplay

You gave rise to stars
like Megaman, Mario, Sophia the 3rd
Now they've flushed you down the toilet
Like an obsolete turd

But I haven't forgotten
My opinion's unfurled
That you're the best system
In the entire world


How can you even make an NES site without having this pic on it? Ace is a petless dork with a badass pose and an excessive amount of dexterity, who better to represent all NES players?